Friday, 10th March:

Farewell debate - This House wouldn’t vote because they’re basically all bastards.

The Chamber, Palace Green, from 8.30 p.m.


Tom Harwood – Our glorious and supreme President has become utterly disenchanted after getting slightly too involved in student politics.

Jack Gilmore – Our Treasurer is the Political Officer of DUCA. Which explains a lot.



George Jackson – Our beloved past President hails from rural Shropshire and therefore doesn’t know what a ‘bastard’ is. Or a politician. Or a House.

Jonty Bayliss – Our new President-Elect doesn’t want to question the reason for the low turnout in his election.

Clara Hodge – Our Sponsorship Secretary is just genuinely too lovely to contemplate anyone being anything but lovely either.